Well, here goes! I've got just over a month before I start a six year journey to an education. After a hard start in childhood, a bad time in foster family, I became 16 and was ready for the world. I left school before the conclusion of my GCSE exams, and so, on paper, I am uneducated. 16 years old from an unbelievably poor family, I was ready to line my pockets with the kind of currency that I'd never yet known. Honest pay, for unfairly hard graft. My interest in knowledge, six or seven years away yet (I mean, honestly, I floated through my entire education, uninterested, uninspired, unprepared to take on the information on offer. I get to 22/23 years old and my mind suddenly 'turns on' and I am insatiable for knowledge, I literally hold on to every nugget of info I come across, somehow able to recall all kinds of things, but this is my luck, I only mention it because this pattern has repeated itself over and again all my life. Had I started secondary education at 21, I probably would have rocked it!).
Fast forward more years than I'd care for you to know, I am physically affected by a disability, mentally traumatised by early adolescent abuse, I find myself in receipt of benefits, no real self worth, but most importantly, I am a father to two children, and even more amazingly, I'm making a relationship work. My son, the sun in my universe, is born with (seemingly) a gift. The boy is intellectually advanced! How can this be? A product of mine being the one that's ahead of his peers? I still have trouble accepting this at times, not because the boy is advanced, but that I could have any baring on something so positive (such is the low opinion I have of myself).
With my son being so brilliant, I hoped that one day I may inspire him to pursue education further than the required standard of the state. And to do so at the earliest possible opportunity. And so I started to think about that old saying, 'lead by example'. I'm sure there's a statistic somewhere, conducted by someone, that says a person is more likely to get a university education if that person has a parent that has a university degree. I come from a family where nobody has a secondary education, let alone a uni education.
Perhaps had I grown up in the kind of family that I have provided for my kids, I might have had an easier time at school, perhaps I would have followed the academic path. Alas, lamenting 'could have beens' will depress the balls out of anyone! Ultimately, I now feel that I have the capacity and ability to try, (at the very least, try) to complete an honours degree. I have some weeks before my studies commence, (I have family members asking why am I bothering) I am feeling nervous, but in a good way, excited to start this new chapter of my life, I may be a little late to the party, but I'm optimistic about the end.
I will check in with another blog a few weeks after my course starts. If you're reading this, and you're not sure whether uni is the right thing for you, remember, it certainly isn't the wrong thing!
Til next time, Den