Saw on David Attenborough's 'Madagascar' last night a rather sneaky female parrot who mates with all the male parrots in the area, then lays a clutch of eggs. As none of the males know which (if any) of the eggs/chicks are carrying their genes forward, all of them bend over backwards to keep the female well fed and watered while the chicks are growing up. Now no getting away from it, it's all clever stuff, but having said that some of the really thick sixteen year old pram-faced slappers living on my estate seem to have come up with a very similar strategy...
Taking it one stage further, it was also worthy of note that the female parrot loses her feathers and develops an ugly coloured baldy head during the mating season, so she actually looks at her worst while taking on all comers. This is also mirrored in the actions of the pram-faced sixteen year olds, who are among the most aesthetically challenged but most accommodating of the local lasses generally, but who seem to go the 'extra-mile' in making themselves even more unattractive during the mating ritual by getting pissed out of their brains on alcopops and snakebite...
Ain't nature wonderful
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How very true! I couldn't help but think of the Jeremy Kyle show while I read this aswell... can't think whyNew comment
Hi Rebecca
Yep - all very 'Jeremy'... If them there boy parrots ever get their hands on a DNA profiling kit there's one baldy lady parrot gonna have her beak pushed well out of joint!
Coming back to the pram faced slappers, though, I guess the alcopops and cider are more necessity than choice. The long, spotty, streaks of urine they drape themselves over are all pretty much bottom feeders too. I imagine they just pull their trackie waistband down for the duration rather than taking them right off, and it would be nice to think they let go of the leads holding their pitbull crossbreeds ("shut up ghostface!"), or at least tie them up, but probably not...
Oh god... I know I sound like the most boring, farty, boring-old-middle-england-daily-mail-reading-fart imaginable, but it does really, really get my goat. There are millions and millions of lovely, bright, wonderful, funny teens out there too, I'm sure. They just don't make good telly like the JK (not Rowling) ne'er do wells or the neds that hang around on street corners swigging on white lightning strength gut-rot and sucking on-rollups.
Children in need? Children in need? I'll tell you what they need - a bloody good kick up the arse! Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!