Saw in the paper yesterday that Paul Daniels got hit in the face with a Pizza thrown by Sooty. And this is the man who used to claim he could catch bullets in his teeth? Age takes no prisoners, I know, but that’s a hell of a come down. Perhaps Sooty took him by surprise – I wouldn’t put it past the nasty little bastard. Seriously, I know that may come as a bit of a shock for some, but I used to have a hot water bottle cover that went out with Soo for a while and she reckons he’s a right nasty piece of work... Treats Sweep like a dog and pays him peanuts, which considering they’re supposed to be a double act says it all. Sweep tried to branch out on his own at one point – start a new arm of the business – but Sooty had Butch and Ramsbottom rough him up. That’s why he can only talk in a squeak these days – permanent damage of the larynx after Ramsbottom tried to throttle him. Sooty had it all hushed up – Soo reckoned he had the judge’s ear right the way through the trial and two jurors in his pocket. Harry Corbett was rumoured to have a hand in it as well, but him and sooty feel out a few months later,
That’s why Harry left the show, in fact, and went and did Steptoe and Son instead. Couldn’t bear working with him anymore, if you’ll excuse the pun. Mind you, out of the frying pan and into the fire there, apparently, ‘cos Wilfred Bramble turned out to be an even bigger thorn in his side. And Hercules the horse was no saint either, so I’ve heard...
I wonder if it was a professional thing, though, the pizza incident, ‘cos Sooty does a bit of magic too, doesn’t he? Or maybe it had something to do with them fighting over Debbie McGee? There have been rumours, ever since she appeared at the Tunbridge Wells Assembly Hall with Bobby Davro, Julian Clary and Fanny the Wonder Dog. No, probably the first – but you’d have thought they would have fought it out properly with magic wands at forty paces, wouldn’t you? A bit like Harry Potter, only with Sooty standing in for Harry and Paul Daniels as the repulsive, snake featured embodiment of all that is evil. You’ll like this Wingardium Leviossa – not a lot, but...
Talking of Harry Potter, did you hear that lovely story about Emma Watson being ‘bullied’ at University in the States? Every time they asked her a question and she answered it correctly the rest of the class would shout ‘3 points to Gryffindor’. Hardly bullying, and she said it isn’t true anyway, but a brilliant joke that should have happened if it didn’t, iykwim.
Blimey, just thought – Holiday in 2 weeks and I’ll be taking the boy to the ‘Wonderful Wizarding World of Harry Potter’. $20.00 dollars for a Wizards Wand, apparently. I’ll tell them where they can stick that particular stick, and it isn’t up their Wizard’s Sleeve. Probably ;).
Haven’t flown in year’s (broomstick or aeroplane!) so I’m feeling a bit nervous, Do they still give you a barley sugar to suck? Only Ben’s Gluten-Free, you see, so I’ll have to get him a spangle or something. Will that work? Is it the sucking that stops your ears popping or the barley itself? And is it true if you cough while taking off and sucking at the same time your head implodes with all the mixed pressures? I’ll tell Ben that the day before we go; if he screams loud enough we might get upgraded to first class...
Izzy Wizzy, let’s get busy
Saw in the paper yesterday that Paul Daniels got hit in the face with a Pizza thrown by Sooty. And this is the man who used to claim he could catch bullets in his teeth? Age takes no prisoners, I know, but that’s a hell of a come down. Perhaps Sooty took him by surprise – I wouldn’t put it past the nasty little bastard. Seriously, I know that may come as a bit of a shock for some, but I used to have a hot water bottle cover that went out with Soo for a while and she reckons he’s a right nasty piece of work... Treats Sweep like a dog and pays him peanuts, which considering they’re supposed to be a double act says it all. Sweep tried to branch out on his own at one point – start a new arm of the business – but Sooty had Butch and Ramsbottom rough him up. That’s why he can only talk in a squeak these days – permanent damage of the larynx after Ramsbottom tried to throttle him. Sooty had it all hushed up – Soo reckoned he had the judge’s ear right the way through the trial and two jurors in his pocket. Harry Corbett was rumoured to have a hand in it as well, but him and sooty feel out a few months later,
That’s why Harry left the show, in fact, and went and did Steptoe and Son instead. Couldn’t bear working with him anymore, if you’ll excuse the pun. Mind you, out of the frying pan and into the fire there, apparently, ‘cos Wilfred Bramble turned out to be an even bigger thorn in his side. And Hercules the horse was no saint either, so I’ve heard...
I wonder if it was a professional thing, though, the pizza incident, ‘cos Sooty does a bit of magic too, doesn’t he? Or maybe it had something to do with them fighting over Debbie McGee? There have been rumours, ever since she appeared at the Tunbridge Wells Assembly Hall with Bobby Davro, Julian Clary and Fanny the Wonder Dog. No, probably the first – but you’d have thought they would have fought it out properly with magic wands at forty paces, wouldn’t you? A bit like Harry Potter, only with Sooty standing in for Harry and Paul Daniels as the repulsive, snake featured embodiment of all that is evil. You’ll like this Wingardium Leviossa – not a lot, but...
Talking of Harry Potter, did you hear that lovely story about Emma Watson being ‘bullied’ at University in the States? Every time they asked her a question and she answered it correctly the rest of the class would shout ‘3 points to Gryffindor’. Hardly bullying, and she said it isn’t true anyway, but a brilliant joke that should have happened if it didn’t, iykwim.
Blimey, just thought – Holiday in 2 weeks and I’ll be taking the boy to the ‘Wonderful Wizarding World of Harry Potter’. $20.00 dollars for a Wizards Wand, apparently. I’ll tell them where they can stick that particular stick, and it isn’t up their Wizard’s Sleeve. Probably ;).
Haven’t flown in year’s (broomstick or aeroplane!) so I’m feeling a bit nervous, Do they still give you a barley sugar to suck? Only Ben’s Gluten-Free, you see, so I’ll have to get him a spangle or something. Will that work? Is it the sucking that stops your ears popping or the barley itself? And is it true if you cough while taking off and sucking at the same time your head implodes with all the mixed pressures? I’ll tell Ben that the day before we go; if he screams loud enough we might get upgraded to first class...