Personal Blogs

I can't believe it.  I can walk!  I have been in pain on and off for months, but the past week has been particularly bad, and my poor arthritic foot appeared to have completely given up.  It wasn't even allowing blood to circulate to bring it the nutrients it needed.  I reached a point where I just couldn't take it anymore, which is very unusual, and I went to A&E only moments before I felt I was going to have a pain-induced nervous breakdown.  Anyway, I have been given some new drugs, and they appear to be amazing.  Lots of supposed bad side effects if used for any length of time, but I took a tablet at 6pm yesterday, and by 8pm I was walking properly.  No limping!  Incredible.  Up until very recently I was very much against medication and to some extent I still am.  I've always avoided excess injections, pain relief and certainly mood enhancing substances.  I have been adamant that I don't want steroid treatment, but to be honest, yesterday I would have done anything to stop the pain.  These tablets are specifically termed non steroidal though, so I am happy.  So by 8pm I'd fixed my physical breakage.  At which point my friend phoned me up to let me know the funeral arrangements.  We spoke for an hour or so.  For the first time it really hit home that my friend was dead.  And that I was going to have to attend her funeral.  And that it was going to be awful.  When I hung up the phone I felt my emotional breakage start.  I felt deeply unhappy.  How do I fix emotional breakages?  Wine.  So I started on the wine.  Within a few hours I had managed to temporarily wipe the conversation from my mind.  Emotional breakage fixed.  Not long after however, it became evident that I had consumed considerably too much wine too quickly, and this is where the mental breakage occurred.  My brain stopped working in the way it should.  I phoned up lots of people and have no idea what I said to them; I wrote a letter to my bank manager and I have no idea what that said either, which is reasonably concerning.  I put up a status on facebook to confirm that I was mentally broken.  I was relieved to discover I did not decide to write my blog.  Particularly as at one point I was having yet another Question Time rant.  This morning I ate lots of fruits and vegetables, and drank lots of water, apologised to people and now I am mentally fixed.  So basically in a period of less than 24 hours I managed to break every aspect of my body and soul, each time fixing the breakage by breaking something else.