Personal Blogs

What an amazing few days it has been, full of new and strange and wonderful experiences.  I'm only really writing this to try to take my mind of the intense unpleasantness that is my hangover.  Thursday I left for a bluegrass festival.  Had a fantastic time as I knew I would, some nice surprises in seeing some old faces that I hadn't anticipated seeing.  Met some new ones too, all of which were good meetings.  I did have one or two slip ups as is inevitable in these circumstances, including telling a poor woman for some time how amazing she was.  She was amazing, but no-one wants a drunk banging on about it with such intensity.  Embarrassing, but there it is.  A moment of sadness seeing the deterioration of an old friend, who now lives in a fantasy world of drink infused hallucination, or so I gathered from some of the things he believed to have happened, that quite clearly had not.  Times have changed a lot from when I was in Bath.  Had a good chat with him before he passed out about a sort of stand-in father, though he certainly never acted the role out with any conviction, so more of a friend.  I've missed seeing him, so it was nice to be updated, and know that nothing's really changed.  I have at long last been able to pass on my love, which has been knawing at me for some time, having had to completely cut contact against my will many moons ago.  The bluegrass lot surely can drink.  On the Sunday morning I think I got in a couple of hours sleep, before travelling back to this Wedding.  I do not know how I made it through.  My blinks were about three seconds long.  I did make it, albeit with a poorly functioning brain, leaving me struggling greatly with both body and mouth coordination.  My red eyed glaze did nothing to reduce the desire for people to tease me about my behaviour at the Hen do.  In fact, it served as a huge encouragement as I was too jaded to string sentences together for quite some time, and therefore unable to defend myself in any way that would have made things better.  It was all worth it though.  I felt more relaxed and comfortable at the festival than I can ever remember having been before.  I even picked up instruments and played them which is very unlike me.  Not with anyone I knew admittedly.  I still have the banjo ringing in my ears and can still hear clinch mountain backstep playing repetitively.  Far better than the usual one noted tinitus, if not a little strange.  For the journey back I thought my mate had his radio on, and thought it was quite sweet that he'd bothered to find a bluegrass CD.  All in my addled head in reality, which I found quite incredible.  Now I need a good four days of rest, relaxation, and detox.  I think it may be some time before I feel human again.  Hopefully in time for this Ball, which is my next social hurdle.  Today is proving to be a huge struggle for me, and writing this is not really helping as I had hoped it might.  I think I'll give up on it for today!!