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ROSIE Rushton-Stone

A sprinkling of madness

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I am having the most bizarre day.  I'm truly grateful to have spent it on my own or there is little doubt that I would have been incarcerated.  I've had a full blown fight with my filing cabinet after it accepted the key and then refused to let it go.  I worked myself into quite a stressed-out sweat jiggling it about for a good half an hour.  Then I had a terrible disaster with some sticky back plastic trying to conduct an experiment, which resulted in me having to cut my hair with a pair of nail scissors, as the three pairs of regular scissors would not show themselves.  I restrung my banjo and suffered more injuries than I think I have ever suffered at its neck before.  I made a poster on pain (yes, today, I officially studied at long last!).  It covers about five pages of the several thousand I need to memorise over the following few weeks.  My glass is as ever being viewed as overflowing when in fact it is entirely empty.  Optimism does not adequately describe the concept of passing the forthcoming exam.  I had a fish finger sandwich to put a bit of normality into my day, and I just can't understand why, but I sprinkled a spoonful of coffee into it, and didn't even notice until the first bite.  I don't even drink coffee.  I have spent the remaining time turning the house upside down searching for my brightly coloured special offer star type cards that I use to write difficult-to-remember words on and stick around the house.  For yet another unknown reason I seem to have thought it necessary to hide them somewhere totally obscure, and I am yet to discover the location.  Very frustrating.   I'm giving up.  I've tried very hard to be productive and everything has just turned round and tee-hee'd in my face.  So now I'm going to be entirely unproductive, have a glass of wine, and try to imagine that I am not the idiot I have been so perfectly acting the part of for the earlier part of the day.
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Joyce Rae

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Oh dear, take comfort in the fact that I have days not dissimilar to that. The best thing to do is sit down (with your wine) and reflect on how absurd the day has been and laugh at it.smile

neil

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Rosie

Keys are horrible; they have their own little ways. I'm a janny, I have thousands of the things, and people moan when I can open the door, that they can't, using their self-same keys.

So I'll tell you the trick: stop thinking, stop looking, just turn and let your body do what's required. [You usually have to have the right key; but not always] 

That all sounds a bit stupid. But it works. sometimes the game isn't straight...

arb

neil

ROSIE Rushton-Stone

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Joyce, don't worry, I have been having a good laugh.  It's been one of those days.  And Neil, I know only too well that keys and tension do not mix, but today I did not seem to have my usual self control.  I lost the plot almost immediately, and the key responded with equal force.  I deserved it really!  I am used to wandering round with vast numbers of keys for different reasons - care - every cupboard locked, one key for sugar, one key for soap, one key for a biscuit, another for medication, another for money.  No good at all!  But you're so right, in order to make a difficult key work you must be at one with it, and earlier I was certainly not!  Moral: never fight a key!  You will not only lose the fight, but what remains of your sanity.  Uh-oh.
Joyce Rae

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Hey, wait 'til you start fighting with the fridge. Whenever I go in the fridge (not literally you understand), I can never find what I am looking for because another member of the household has moved things around. Then the comment I frequently get is, "are you fighting with that fridge again?" angry Luv ya

Daniel Bick

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Just out of interest what did the sandwich taste like?

For some strange reason it reminded me of the time i spiked my drunk friends crisps with a tea bag. He doesn't remember eating it but by the look of it it was rather chewy.

Oh and challenging any electrical appliance to a duel of wits is alway interesting. Unless its a washing machine: their f***king mental.

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Hey Rosie

You have the best solution - just laugh at yourself big grin and the whole world laughs with you!  I so love your blog.  I am the clumsiest person I know.  I would have loved that sandwich! x

ROSIE Rushton-Stone

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Joyce, you just gave me a hearty giggle!  I'm assuming you have gathered over the months that I am as literal as can be, but for once, I did not have the literal image of you climbing into your fridge, until you pointed it out, and now it will stay with me forever!  It makes up for yesterday when my friend put up a facebook status about how much she was enjoying learning about taxation etc. - I took that literally and was apparently the only person not to grasp the deep sarcasm she had employed!  And I passed comment.  Fool!

Dan/Daniel - disgusting.  One mouthful, not swallowed.  Coffee and I do not mix at all, with the exception of chocolate covered coffee beans, which I have to eat with caution, as they impact on my behaviour four or five hours post-ingestion.  Caused embarrassment in the past.

And Sue, thanks!  And you were the clumsiest person you knew but now you have competition.  I have phases of clumsiness, and they are so noticeable, that if I tell a friend I have entered into such a phase, they will give me plastic glasses without comment.

Ha, these comments have put me in the very silliest of moods!  Thanks smile