Personal Blogs

Well first of all a very brief re-cap on the last year. I took my final exam towards a degree in psychology with the OU last June. I came out of the exam hall feeling I had done ok - not great, but ok. I collected my result while I was on holiday with my family, waiting for a ferry on North Uist in the Outer Hebrides - it's amazing the places you can pick up WiFi. I was utterly delighted to have received a distinction, which meant that I passed my degree with first class honours. The journey was a roller-coaster but I was so pleased. I worked incredibly hard, especially towards the end, and was relieved beyond words to have got such a good grade.

A few months later and I was on stage in Edinburgh accepting my degree. Another brilliant experience thanks to the OU and wonderful to have the support of family and fellow students.

And then what? Well, nothing really changed. I felt a bit flat that my employer didn't seem especially interested in my achievement and there was no margin to modify my role, working in IT, to something more focussed on people. Months went by and I was beginning to wonder why I had committed 5 years and a huge amount of money to this. Why did I?

Thinking back the reasons weren't about career development, but more that I felt I wanted to prove something to myself. All my friends graduated when they were in their early twenties and I had always told myself I would too. But life - to mis-quote John Lennon - got in the way while I was making other plans. So I have done it. I have proved to myself I have what it takes to graduate in a subject far removed from IT, where I have spent my entire working life. I stood on the stage in Edinburgh with my square hat and shouted my achievement to the world. Unsurprisingly, the world shrugged and muttered "so what"? Fair question - so what?

So I have gained some confidence. I feel I can look my friends and family in the eye, not that they care. I have also (almost incidentally) learned a huge amount about a subject I find fascinating and about which I previously knew very little. That had to be worth something.

Then at Christmas 2016 something else changed. I heard about a friend of my wife who was struggling to find a carer for her 16 year old son. He has autism and needs constant care - I spent quite a chunk of my degree focussing on autism, a condition I find fascinating. We went to meet Ivor (not his real name) just before Christmas and immediately I felt that I really liked him. His movements were clumsy and his social skills were poor, but he seemed happy and very likeable.

In January this year I started working with Ivor on a formal basis, working 8 hours a week on top of my job in IT. I hope that over the next few months and years I will be able to reduce my hours in IT and increase my hours with Ivor and others like him (there is NO ONE like Ivor!). A degree in psychology wasn't a requirement for this work - the only requirements are patience, a caring nature, kindness and empathy. But it helped me just the same. It helped me to recognise the importance of seeing the world through his eyes and of understanding that his hopes, fears, sadness and happiness are just as profound as my own. I see psychology everywhere now - my outlook on life feels transformed.

Since then I have spent a lot of time with Ivor and I really look forward to our days together. The pay is substantially less than I get working in IT, but the rewards and enjoyment are infinitely more. He really likes me and I really like him - we have such fun together. I love his family who have started to feel like an extension of my own family. Sometimes I stop and look back at myself and ask how this happened - how, for example, did I come to be showering a 16 year old boy? When, as a 48 year old IT manager, did I agree to wear a padded sumo wrestling outfit and role about on the ground with an excitable teenager with poor impulse control?

I think much of the above could be summed up by the words "mid life crisis", but it all feels much more rewarding than buying a motorbike. Although one was not a direct consequence of the other I don't think any of this would have happened without my clicking on the "register" button on the OU web page all those months ago.

So - and with that in mind - I've done it again. I have signed up for a language course. I have always wanted to learn a foreign language and thought German might be as good as any. I have therefore just embarked on L161 Exploring Languages and Cultures with the OU. It feels really good to be back at the start, reading material that is, relatively speaking, not all that demanding. I have a TMA due in 6 weeks or so and can't wait.

I could never have predicted the places that studying psychology would take me. I wouldn't swap my time with Ivor for the world. I wonder where studying a foreign language will lead? Well - where ever it is I'll be sure to post about it here.