OU blog

Personal Blogs

Jim McCrory

How To Win Friendships: It all Begins and Ends With Words

Visible to anyone in the world
Edited by Jim McCrory, Saturday, 10 Aug 2024, 08:25


A gentle tongue is a tree of life,
   but deceit in it crushes the spirit.

Proverbs 15:4 (WEB).


A special thanks to Natalie for her inspiring image-https://unsplash.com/@natthornley



There are 26 letters in the English alphabet. The countless sentence structures one can create from these letters are greater than the sands of the sea. Great beauty can emerge from the interaction of these letters combined with human ingenuity. One can say I walked through a field feeling lonely, or you can make your words do a lyrical iambic prance as in I wandered lonely as a cloud as the poet put it to mimic the way he was walking in his loneliness.

So, what am I saying, that we should all go around talking like Wordsworth, Shakespeare or Anne of Green Gables? Of course, not. that's for the written page.  But let me ask you to conduct an experiment. Put on a television programme such as a soap or a movie. Write down a few sentences from a scene. Do you notice anything? It may be a high proportion of the words and sentences are aggressive, hostile, and toxic? Does that not strike you as odd, considering the beauty that language can create?

Hostile words tell you much about the person. On the other hand, there is this lovely thought that was carved on stone centuries ago:

A gentle tongue is a tree of life,

   but deceit in it crushes the spirit.

Proverbs 15:4.


Interesting, don’t you think? How many friends have fallen out over the tongue? How many friendships have been lost? How many acts of violence and wars have begun because of the tongue? How many 'good days' have been lost due to careless babble?

There is no law regarding the use of kind words. Think about it this way, how would you feel if certain phrases you use were spoken back to you by a friend, colleague or family member?  Others will appreciate it if you choose words carefully. It's fundamental to winning friends and influencing people.





Permalink Add your comment
Share post