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“Speak slowly son; then people will feel you have something important to say."

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"Many years ago, I was walking through a shopping centre with a friend when a girl shouted over, saying, 'Who are you with?'

     'Sorry?'

     'Who are you with? Where do you get your energy from?'

It turned out she was trying to sell me an energy contract for gas and electricity. I said to my friend, 'Wasn’t that rude? No hello or excuse me?'

     'Well, Jim,' my friend replied, 'don’t blame the girl. Young people today are exposed to soap operas and dramas where everyone is aggressive to one another.'"

On the other hand, many years ago when I was a young man of thirty, I gave a speech at a religious meeting and an old man as gentle as a dove approached me and complemented me for my speech and drawing on its strengths, then he imparted a piece of wisdom I never forgot. He said, "Speak slowly, then people will appreciate you have something important to say."

There is a quiet power in gentleness, a strength in softness that is often overlooked in a world that values volume and force. Proverbs 25:15 offers a striking paradox: "By patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone." At first glance, these words seem contradictory—how can something soft break something as unyielding as bone? Yet, in the wisdom of this proverb lies an undeniable truth: gentleness, when wielded with patience and wisdom, carries an influence far greater than force.

The Quechua word Urpi, meaning “dove,” reflects this truth beautifully. In Peruvian culture, urpi is more than just a bird; it is a term of endearment for someone of pure heart, someone whose kindness and peace shape the world around them. The dove does not conquer by aggression but by presence, by quiet persistence, by embodying peace in a way that disarms hostility. To be called urpi is not simply to be kind—it is to be a person whose spirit moves gently yet leaves a lasting imprint.

There is a deep connection between this ancient word and the wisdom of Proverbs 25:15. A ruler—a person in power—is not persuaded by shouting or brute force, but by patience. This patience is not passive, nor is it weak. It is the patience of someone who understands that words, when spoken with timing and wisdom, can shift even the hardest of hearts. Likewise, a soft tongue—words spoken with mildness and care—can break what seems unbreakable. Harsh words may force compliance, but gentle words can transform the heart.

Many have experienced this paradox in their own lives. A mentor whose quiet correction carried more weight than a rebuke, a loved one whose gentle wisdom lingered in the mind long after it was spoken. It is easy to dismiss meekness as powerless, but true meekness holds authority—not the authority of control, but the authority of truth spoken with love. When someone who is mild warns us, we listen. When they counsel us, their words penetrate because they are not spoken in anger or pride, but from a place of sincere care.

This is why Jesus himself described his followers as being “as shrewd as serpents and as innocent as doves” (Matthew 10:16). There is nothing passive about this balance. The innocence of a dove does not mean naivety, just as a soft tongue does not mean weakness. True gentleness carries with it a deliberate strength, a force that does not coerce but convinces, that does not demand but transforms. It is the slow-moving river that, over time, carves stone; the wind that, with patience, wears down the hardest rock.

There is a lesson here for all who seek to influence others—not through volume or intimidation, but through the quiet persistence of wisdom and love. In a world that rewards noise, be the person whose words are few but whose presence is weighty. In a world that equates dominance with power, be urpi, the one whose peace disarms, whose counsel lingers, whose gentleness transforms.

Note: 

All Bible verses from the Berean Standard Bible