There is a word from Nigeria and other parts of Africa that names something we are close to forgetting. Ubuntu. It means, I am because we are.
Not as an idea, but as a fact. A recognition that the self does not stand alone. That our lives are shaped, steadied, and sustained by others.
And yet, it feels absent now.
Look around. Families are strained. Friendships feel thinner. Nations are locked into suspicion. The bonds that once held us together did not snap overnight. They loosened slowly, almost politely, until we woke up in a quieter, lonelier world. Something essential has slipped from our hands.
Once, life was built around community. People belonged to one another without explanation. Neighbours showed up. Needs were shared. Joy multiplied because it was witnessed. Today, life feels more like a private contest. “Take care of yourself” has replaced “How can I help?” We have traded we for me, and the cost is beginning to show.
Individual freedom has given us real gifts. Choice. Agency. Dignity. These matter. But when independence becomes the highest value, something deeper erodes. We forget how dependent we truly are. Self-sufficiency hardens into isolation. Strength begins to resemble withdrawal.
Technology was meant to draw us closer. In one sense, it has. Distance collapses. Messages travel instantly. Faces appear on screens across continents. And still, loneliness grows.
A screen cannot carry presence. A notification cannot sit beside you in grief. Digital applause dissolves the moment it appears. We are surrounded by noise, yet starved for nearness. Connection becomes simulated, not shared.
Work and money widen the distance further. People scatter for opportunity, leaving behind the slow work of relationship. Parents become voices on the phone. Friends become updates once a year. Life moves forward, but roots loosen.
Pressure does the rest. When survival consumes our days, relationships shrink. Exhaustion turns inward. Financial stress strains marriages, families, communities. People stop reaching out and start enduring alone.
The old gathering places fade. Extended families thin out. Neighbourhoods grow anonymous. Churches and civic spaces empty. Belonging becomes conditional, temporary, fragile.
Politics sharpens the divide. Listening is replaced by shouting. Disagreement becomes moral failure. We are taught to see enemies instead of neighbours, tribes instead of people. The public square turns hostile, then hollow.
On a global scale, the pattern repeats. Borders tighten. Compassion narrows. Faced with shared crises, we retreat. We protect what is ours and call it wisdom. Unity feels risky. Division feels safer.
So where does that leave us?
Rebuilding will not begin with grand gestures. It will start small. A call made instead of delayed. A neighbour noticed. A meal shared. Presence chosen. These acts seem minor, but they carry weight. They mend what abstraction breaks.
We may need to slow down. Relationships cannot be rushed or optimized. They demand time, patience, attention. The very things modern life trains us to avoid.
Technology does not need to disappear. It needs to serve. Not replace life, but point us back to it. Toward faces, voices, shared rooms.
Ubuntu reminds us of a truth we resist but need. No one thrives alone. We rise together or not at all. We are held by one another, whether we admit it or not.
The world feels fractured. But fracture is not the end. What has been loosened can still be bound again, if we choose to live as though others truly matter.
It is not too late to reconnect.
The question remains whether we will.
Scripture puts it plainly:
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. If one falls, the other can lift him up. But pity the one who falls alone.
Words That Deserve Our Attention—Ubuntu
Words That Deserve Our Attention—Ubuntu
There is a word from Nigeria and other parts of Africa that names something we are close to forgetting. Ubuntu.
It means, I am because we are.
Not as an idea, but as a fact. A recognition that the self does not stand alone. That our lives are shaped, steadied, and sustained by others.
And yet, it feels absent now.
Look around. Families are strained. Friendships feel thinner. Nations are locked into suspicion. The bonds that once held us together did not snap overnight. They loosened slowly, almost politely, until we woke up in a quieter, lonelier world. Something essential has slipped from our hands.
Once, life was built around community. People belonged to one another without explanation. Neighbours showed up. Needs were shared. Joy multiplied because it was witnessed. Today, life feels more like a private contest. “Take care of yourself” has replaced “How can I help?” We have traded we for me, and the cost is beginning to show.
Individual freedom has given us real gifts. Choice. Agency. Dignity. These matter. But when independence becomes the highest value, something deeper erodes. We forget how dependent we truly are. Self-sufficiency hardens into isolation. Strength begins to resemble withdrawal.
Technology was meant to draw us closer. In one sense, it has. Distance collapses. Messages travel instantly. Faces appear on screens across continents. And still, loneliness grows.
A screen cannot carry presence. A notification cannot sit beside you in grief. Digital applause dissolves the moment it appears. We are surrounded by noise, yet starved for nearness. Connection becomes simulated, not shared.
Work and money widen the distance further. People scatter for opportunity, leaving behind the slow work of relationship. Parents become voices on the phone. Friends become updates once a year. Life moves forward, but roots loosen.
Pressure does the rest. When survival consumes our days, relationships shrink. Exhaustion turns inward. Financial stress strains marriages, families, communities. People stop reaching out and start enduring alone.
The old gathering places fade. Extended families thin out. Neighbourhoods grow anonymous. Churches and civic spaces empty. Belonging becomes conditional, temporary, fragile.
Politics sharpens the divide. Listening is replaced by shouting. Disagreement becomes moral failure. We are taught to see enemies instead of neighbours, tribes instead of people. The public square turns hostile, then hollow.
On a global scale, the pattern repeats. Borders tighten. Compassion narrows. Faced with shared crises, we retreat. We protect what is ours and call it wisdom. Unity feels risky. Division feels safer.
So where does that leave us?
Rebuilding will not begin with grand gestures. It will start small. A call made instead of delayed. A neighbour noticed. A meal shared. Presence chosen. These acts seem minor, but they carry weight. They mend what abstraction breaks.
We may need to slow down. Relationships cannot be rushed or optimized. They demand time, patience, attention. The very things modern life trains us to avoid.
Technology does not need to disappear. It needs to serve. Not replace life, but point us back to it. Toward faces, voices, shared rooms.
Ubuntu reminds us of a truth we resist but need. No one thrives alone. We rise together or not at all. We are held by one another, whether we admit it or not.
The world feels fractured. But fracture is not the end. What has been loosened can still be bound again, if we choose to live as though others truly matter.
It is not too late to reconnect.
The question remains whether we will.
Scripture puts it plainly:
Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor.
If one falls, the other can lift him up.
But pity the one who falls alone.
—Ecclesiastes 4:9
Image by Copilot