Yaws forever
Personal Blogs
I think death's breath
Is hot not
cold
as has
been foretold.
If you're really serious about regaining a youthful figure, cut back on how much you eat.
Remember the old saying, “Limitation is the sincerest form of flatter me.”
Courtney!
"Someone's cut off my hair while I was asleep!" Tom sounded distressed.
My new TV series, Watchspring Watch, has quite a few episodes. You need to watch it gradually unwind.
The Thrush is full of
Hope
And so am I
If my grandad saw the quality of modern chair legs, he'd be turning in his grave.
In spite of the risk
I take my hat off to birds.
Once Dad was a great skier. Now he's going downhill fast.
There were two birds sat on a twig
The first was small, the other big.
The first was small, the other fat.
And there they sat and sat and sat.
I once campaigned with Caesar in Gaul. Every evening we slept in a new place. We always had to get out our trenching tools and build an earthwork, a ‘vallum' as we called it, around our temporary camp. Caesar would say “Men, this is our Fort for the Day”.
Little Willy, in a tiff
Shoved his sister oe'r the cliff.
Her rate of acceleration, he reckoned
Was 32 feet per second per second.
Q. What did the first seedling say to the second seedling?
A. When you've got to grow, you've got to grow!
If you execute them all at once
There will be no one left to blame.
"Hmm. Where should I go next?", Tom wondered.
Chichaua vs Great Dane. There's a paradox.
A Pupil asked the Abbess, "How shall I become a Scholar?"
The Abbess replied, "You have already asked the first question!"
You, sleeping
Fingers spread like twigs
The blackbird perching
Sings you awake.
Our pet snake is years old. He's had loads of accidents, but he seems to bear a charmed life.
Corny jokes. Are they the lowest form of wheat?
(Rolls in field laughing.)
Well they are. Sort of. The term 'corny' as applied to jokes is only from early in the last century. Before that it just meant rustic (someone from where they grow the corn, geddit?), with the associated sense of being rough and unsophisticated.
Scientists are trying to breed a camel with three humps. If they succeed it'll be a triumph.
Gran loved predicting plagues. "Always look on the blight side", she'd say.
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