lonely man
i heard the bottles
clanking in your bag
Personal Blogs
passing in the night
Friday, 14 Jul 2017, 23:15
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Computer Art
Wednesday, 12 Jul 2017, 22:51
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I find this picture quite impressive, although it was generated by a machine. I'd hang it on my wall. What do you think?
You can read more here
Limerick
Wednesday, 12 Jul 2017, 00:31
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Edited by Richard Walker, Wednesday, 12 Jul 2017, 00:33
There was an old fellow called Tryg,
Who swore he would not wear a wig.
He said, my head's bare,
But why should I care?
And he went off and danced a fierce jig.
Post Nomial Letters
Tuesday, 11 Jul 2017, 23:40
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Edited by Richard Walker, Tuesday, 11 Jul 2017, 23:45
I've changed my name by deed-poll. Now I'm officially Richard Walker-Cos.
A bit status conscious I know, but I wanted the lettuce after my name.
A bit status conscious I know, but I wanted the lettuce after my name.
The Long Way I Shall Travel
Tuesday, 11 Jul 2017, 23:18
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Now in my thinking and my thought
It's still better and I ought
To take the long way back through the all rain
Even as I know, I shall not visit here again.
Touch Tours Forever
Tuesday, 11 Jul 2017, 22:56
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The Sedgwick museum in Cambridge is a marvelous place for anyone that loves geology, and especially if you also love the history of the subject.
I'm on the mailing list for a local charity Camsight, who I'm thrilled to find today are discussing with Sedgwick Museum how to arrange a touch tour for the blind. This kind of initiative is what reassures me that, in the end, the human race is honorable after all.
Old Saying
Tuesday, 11 Jul 2017, 01:46
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It's love that makes the world grow round.
New Alphabet
Tuesday, 11 Jul 2017, 01:16
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I've invented a new alphabet that goes straight from P to R. I call it "Jumping the queue".
Haiku
Monday, 10 Jul 2017, 00:59
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Bumble bees
It's a one-way street.
You've learned nothing from me.
Haiku
Monday, 10 Jul 2017, 00:04
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I thought nobody heard me,
In the graveyard.
Not pissing but crying.
In the graveyard.
Not pissing but crying.
Tom Swiftie
Sunday, 9 Jul 2017, 10:31
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Edited by Richard Walker, Sunday, 9 Jul 2017, 23:55
"Ding-Dong! Avon Calling!", said Tom in a withering manner.
Tom Swiftie
Saturday, 8 Jul 2017, 12:50
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"Whom put a spider down Grandma's neck is wrong, it should be 'who', not 'whom'", Tom explained grammatically.
A Song My Father Taught Me
Friday, 7 Jul 2017, 23:24
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Literally. My father had an old banjo and he liked to strum and sing. Some of the songs he sang were versions of well-known folk songs, although I didn't know it at the time, or even that there were such things as folk-songs.
A song I particularly remember is "Barbara Allen".
Twas in the merry month of May,
When green buds all were swelling.
Young Jimmy Groves on his death-bed lay.
For love of Barbara Allen.
This is a melancholy story, of love unrequited, and repentance come too late. Our own family version ends
As she was going across the fields
She heard the death bell knelling.
And stroke to her did say
Hard-hearted Barbara Allen.
Oh mother, oh mother, go dig my grave
Dig it both long and narrow.
Young Jimmy died for love of me
And I will die tomorrow.
There is real poetry there I think.
Although I had no idea about it back then, the song is in the famous collection of ballads assembled by Francis Child. The first known publication is from 1740, but Samuel Pepys in his diaries mentions what looks to be the same ballad. The Wikipedia article is very informative.
Later in my early twenties I heard Joan Baez sing the song, and I still love the way she does it. But she (and many others) add a final consolatory verse, in which the sad pair are in the end united, a rose and a briar that grow from their respective graves, and intertwine. I don't like that. It is a sad poem and best kept so.
Grammar Made Silly
Thursday, 6 Jul 2017, 23:58
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Did you know people who 'knew their letters' were at one time consider to be dangerously clever?
They could could fascinate unschooled folk, and lead them astray, by employing dark knowledge of writing, and so these grammarians were called glamorous.
Be as that may*, here are some pre-release definitions from my upcoming book, Grammar Made Silly.
noun = occasionally, as in 'noun then'
adverb = a doing word, encouraging us to buy, as in 'save '
pronoun = singular of pronounce
conjunction = road intersection noted for the sale of genuine designer goods
* Subjunctive mood, let it be noted.
Man's Best Friend
Thursday, 6 Jul 2017, 00:59
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I found you can buy Pal Dog Food on eBay. So you'd be paying for Pal with PayPal.
One Liner
Wednesday, 5 Jul 2017, 22:05
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Edited by Richard Walker, Wednesday, 5 Jul 2017, 22:22
The judge said, "To serve five years".
"Is that a proper sentence?", I asked doubtfully. "It doesn't have a finite verb".
One Liner
Wednesday, 5 Jul 2017, 21:52
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Edited by Richard Walker, Wednesday, 5 Jul 2017, 21:53
My watch doesn't show hours or minutes. Mind you it's only second-hand.
I went to the Doctor
Tuesday, 4 Jul 2017, 02:20
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I said "Doctor, Doctor. I keep imagining I'm a kind of irregular garden paving". She said, "You're crazy".
A Children's Verse
Tuesday, 4 Jul 2017, 02:12
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Edited by Richard Walker, Tuesday, 4 Jul 2017, 02:26
I don't know if you've smooched a mammoth.
If you have, then you'll know it's a hoot.
For this woolly mammal,
Twice the size of a camel,
Just adores a big kiss on its snoot.
One Liner
Tuesday, 4 Jul 2017, 00:59
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I was expecting a helicopter to pick me up. But my chopper was axed.
One Liner
Tuesday, 4 Jul 2017, 00:55
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Traditional cottage pie for dinner tonight. The thatch was a bit chewy, if I'm honest.
Limerick
Tuesday, 4 Jul 2017, 00:29
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Edited by Richard Walker, Tuesday, 4 Jul 2017, 01:03
There was a young lady from Belvoir,
Who said mispronouncing would grelvoir.
She explained, "In this word,
A large rodent is heard".
But she found no-one would belelvoir.
Haiku
Monday, 3 Jul 2017, 23:52
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Up on the high grassland,
Warriors lie yet unburied.
Glory.
Alla Barnen Day Trips
Monday, 3 Jul 2017, 23:23
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All the kids loved the day out. Except Russ.
He was forced to run along beside the bus.
All the kids loved the helicopter flight. Except Dwight.
When you're outside, you have to cling on tight.
All the kids loved the underwater adventure. Except Jeff.
He found it hard to hold his breath.
All the kids loved the zoo trip. Except Jack.
He ended up as a snack.
All the kids enjoyed the castle visit. Except Neil.
He didn't realize the guillotine was real.
One Liner
Saturday, 1 Jul 2017, 21:53
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I was prosecuted for blocking a right of way. It was my defence that got me off.
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