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Strange
[ 4 minute read ]
Opinion
I couldn't sleep last night. My face kept tickling. Of course, I know why I couldn't sleep and my face tickled; my neighbour has come back from charging the batteries he uses to power his malevolence. I kind of feel sorry for him because he doesn't know he is an ogre. Don't worry, I know I am being uncharitable, well at least in trying to understand him. I gave up trying to engage him in conversation long ago. He simply wouldn't stop and say a single unsolicited sentence. Hark! There is a chorus of elderly voices calling that he probably just wanted to be left alone; for six years?
No, he has a hatred towards the world because, I suspect, he doesn't understand it. His misanthropy I have witnessed and I have been shocked at the breadth and depth of it. My face tickled last night because his throbbing cynicism moved the spiritual air and my face felt it like single threads from spider webs being dragged across my skin. There were other parts of my body that tickled last night but I don't have an answer for that yet.
I eventually got up. Do something you are good at, I thought; make yourself happy and relax. I, of course turned on a laptop and explored. Being in my living room is a fairly safe place from my neighbour's influence even though I sometimes get the feeling there is a zombie overlooking my shoulder as I work on some of the files. He doesn't believe I am an undergraduate so I thought I should, like many other students waiting for their academic year to start, do some preliminary work. That should soothe the looming aspect of my neighbour's projection, if he stumbles across me in my home. It is incongruous for an idiot to be studying anything so his confusion continues uninterrupted. Job done; he will just move on and wake cats and dogs in the neighbourhood as he passes through kitchen and bedroom walls. A few people will toss and turn until he leaves but no real harm will occur.
Every now and then I download some stuff I think might be useful. I don't run any MicroSoft software, as far as I know, so everything is cool; if I believe that the software developers are not foreign spies or hackers. The British hackers are all kind and helpful and make software to help elderly people cross the road, don't you know? It is rare that I ignore the probability of Trojan Horses cantering through my operating system but sometimes you just have to recognise that you might have to spend six or seven hours reformatting your hard drive because you couldn't be bothered to save everything only to duplicated memory sticks, and just download stuff in that same recognition.
I might wave my laptop towards my neighbour the next time I see him, to see if it makes any difference. Files that I lost when I moved partitions on the hard drive might come back but they may also be quite ephemeral and covered in spiritual cobwebs and so be unusable.
'Hey, Camelly! Come closer. Wooo! Wooo! Thanks.'
All I need is a Spiritual File Reader or SFR. Amazon will probably have one, if not them then definitely Temu. I might not like the cost though; it would likely be a piece of my soul. Well, there's an epiphany; I think my neighbour has allowed monsters to nibble away his soul or his own introspective nature has been like a solvent on it. I think the monsters might like the by-product of his dissolved soul and that is why he is empty of empathy. So sad.
You think me cruel. I am. I have detached emotions and it is my wont to caricature real life. It is even my escape. If I am honest, which I usually am, if my soul and my neighbour's soul went into a spiritual clothes shop for a fitting we would both come out wearing the same clothes in the same size. However, I would look incredible and he would look like a muddy puddle with a broken umbrella in it. Do you know why? You have to embrace eccentricity and weirdness; claim it as your own and never hide it. You should never be embarrassed by your... (at this point I shall consult my Roget's Thesaurus for some tasty words) Cue the music 'Left Bank Two' by The Noveltones (Link to a YouTube video of the Vision On Gallery music) while I search.
Ah ha! You should never be embarrassed by your... wackiness or your oddity; by being zany, kinky or queer, or by having a funny obsession. People will love us for it. If we hide it, people will cross the road because we are weird. Wear a top hat; sing while you cycle (I doff imaginary hats to fair maidens and dowagers alike); tell people how loud an egg exploding in a bowl of water heated in a microwave is; laugh at your image on the back of a spoon; or pull faces at the moon; who cares?