Personal Blogs

I am going away for a couple of days

much needed break in north Wales, staying on my girlfriend's yacht in Conwy, cannot wait to just get away and leave work at home!! unfortunatly no sailing as boat is out the water for some winter maintenance.

I am so tired lately!! No idea why either

hopefully I will come back nice and refreshed on Sunday!!

When I decided to undertake this degree I had no idea how hard I would find it, even with my daughter in school I still don't seem to have much time and sometimes much motivation for doing work.

I try so hard to get my head into my studies, I want this degree more than anything. I've worked hard for the last two years to prepare myself for this so why can't I just sit down and do my work?

For the past few years Ive been suffering with major depression, call it fallout from a highly stressful and abusive 10 year relationship. People can't see depression, it doesn't have any physical manifestations and it is one of the hardest psychological illnesses to explain. People see it at laziness, or just a general can't be bothered attitude but it really isn't like that.

I get up with every intention of doing my work, I wake feeling full on and ready to face the world, then the dark clouds descend and work is the last thing on my mind.There are also days when I sit at my desk work in hand when my mind will start going 100mph thinking of every single thing in the world except my work. Of course there are good days, the ones where I sit down and actually do my work, like when I did my TMA01.

I'm not using depression as an excuse to not do work, I fight every single day to not let it take over so I can do what I need to do.

My daughter keeps me going, she is the light in my life and without her I would probably not be here.

I know no one will read this, which is fine, but if anyone does and you too are struggling get in touch. Be nice to talk about issues with someone who understands!!

'may the mass x acceleration be with you'