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You made your bed so you lie in it!
[ 4 minute read ]
In my book, 'Encyclopedia of Superstitions' by E. & M.A. Radford, written in 1974, and edited by Christina Hole, there is an entry on 'Beds'; 'If three people take part in making one bed, someone will die in it within the year.'
Roald Dahl wote some short stories of mystery and intrigue. I think he might have had fun with this superstition. Either three siblings are eager for their parent's treasure and one of them lays on the bed later in the same year; or there might be a coroner's report stating 'Death by natural causes' and then it comes to light that the deceased's three offspring innocently, or nefariously, shared the housekeeping duties for one day in the last year, including making the bed.
It can get more intriguing if the bed-making occurred in Oxfordshire:
'If one day you should wed,
Turn your bed from foot to head.'
The three plotting siblings may inadvertently kill their ailing parent's new spouse.
By now, in any good story, the three siblings may even have advertised their assassin services with cards in telephone boxes across the UK (in the 1970s and 80s of course).
It was just an unfortunate series of events
In court:The house-help nervously chewed on her bottom lip.
'I was told to take the day off because his children thought I was very kind but needed to take a bit of a break. Gor Blimey! I needed one!'
Later, the barrister in friendly, almost conversational tones asked the oldest sibling,
'Your father was quite unwell by this time. Did you or your siblings help around the house?'
'Yes, I believe we did on occasion.'
'Clean the floors? Make the bed?'
'Yes, Matilda, Mary and I shared the tasks when the help took a day off. We told her she needed one.'
'Do you have much experience with housework?'
'Good Gracious, no! We even had to share making the bed together.'
'All three of you! Is it a big bed?'
'No, not really, but it took all three of us to turn the mattress and then remake the bed with sheets and blankets. You know, sort of tuck everything in.'
'Quite.'
***
It is unlucky to enter the bed on one side and leave it next morning by the other.
Joke:
Sister Mary was walking towards the chapel for early morning prayers when she suddenly stumbled.
'Goodness! Did you get out of the bed the wrong side?' asked Sister Jude.
'No, I just tripped' replied Sister Mary.
After prayers, Sister Mary, in the refectory, stumbled again and dropped her bowl as she moved towards a table to eat.
'Goodness! Did you get out of bed the wrong side today?' asked Sister Grace.
'No. The floor is uneven,' replied Sister Mary.
Throughout the day, Mary was asked the same question, 'Did you get out of bed the wrong side today?'
Eventually, Sister Mary was asked by Mother Rose. By now, Sister Mary was puzzled.
'Why does everyone keep asking me if I got out of bed on the wrong side today, Mother Rose?' asked Sister Mary.
'You're wearing the Bishop's shoes.' said Mother Rose.
***
In keeping with the secret tryst idea. 'In Northumberland, it was deemed unlucky for one person to be the sole owner of bees. There should be a partnership between a man and a woman of different households. Joint ownership by a man and his wife was not enough, presumably because they were considered to have been made one by marriage.' (Encyclopedia of Superstitions).
'I am just going to see to the bees, dear.'
Sally, a superstitious woman, looked at her husband and then looked out the window at the flock of birds flying from left to right and thoughtfully nodded.
'That's fine dear. I have to pop out to make a phone call.' She knew there was a card with a telephone number on it in the phone box at the end of the lane that advertised 'Housekeeping Help by Three Siblings', and thought she might stay with her sister for a year or so.