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[ 3 minute read ]
Thorny Thicket of Problems
Self-concept and ideal-self
Apparently, we have a concept of self; a self-concept. This is a complex set of ideas we have about ourselves. This self-concept influences how we perceive other people as well as ourselves (Eysenck, 1996). This is based on how we see ourselves and our idea of our own position in society.
We also have an idea of our ideal-self (how we think we are supposed to be). Knowing this might give us cause to nod our heads sagely when we meet some people. The goal for all of us is to make sure the self-concept and the ideal-self match, or are at least similar. We are all aware of how fashion models give a false impression of how a woman's body is and should be. Just like imagining an audience naked when we give a speech or a performance, we might imagine fashion models to be stinky after hours and hours in front of hot studio lights, if they don't have people throwing buckets of rose-water over them every now and again. Well, that false impression is right here, right now.
Incongruence between self-concept and ideal-self can cause some people to seek therapy, in which the goal is to improve self-esteem. Incongruence between self-concept and ideal-self can also cause enough stress in an individual that a self-fulfilling prophecy unravels itself, simply because the stress brought on by this incongruence steals energy away from doing well in examinations. However, what happens if the self-concept and the ideal-self match in an arrogant person? We cannot praise them for any achievement, I suggest, because untrained as we are, we may potentially reinforce negative behaviour instead of reinforce positive behaviour. I suggest we may have a runaway train on our hands. If someone does not get the praise they think they deserve from the people around them, those people are likely to be considered, by the arrogant person, to be not clever enough to understand that arrogant person, and therefore their approbation is considered worthless as a result. No praise means they are unable to praise, so no praise is expected.
I think when the parameters of a goal are clear but an individual feels that they, themselves, are inadequate to meet the challenge of producing something within those binding limits, the individual attacks the parameters. Well, perhaps not 'attack' but certainly, to my mind, unnecessarily scrutinise the parameters, albeit obliquely. A word limit on an assignment for a student may seem to be the problem for some students. 'How can people conform to that?' may become for others 'I can't conform to that.' This could be a disappointment for a student if their self-concept told them that they could do whatever is necessary to reach a goal. Unfortunately, their self-concept could crash down to such low depths that the ideal-self is at once and forever an unreachable fantasy. Just like that, like the click of our fingers, we can shatter our lives.
I am often completely bamboozled that students allow themselves to be led, like sheep towards a sheep-dip, in a linear fashion by academic bodies. The whole concept of believing that there is only a single route to success or through a forest of problems dressed in thorns is just preposterous to me. It smacks of a disparity between self-concept and ideal-self. I don't for one minute suggest that we all throw fire-accelerants over thickets of thorny problems to get to our goals like some prominent public figures do; I suggest that we learn to understand the problems so we can reshape them to fit our own capabilities. That really does require an accurate self-concept that matches a realistic ideal-self, though.
I should be able to do this, so why can't I? is not the same as everyone else can do this and I am struggling to do it. On the face of it, we all, in most cases, have the same set of obstacles that prevent us achieving our similar goals. People re-shape their problems and win, that's all.
References
Eysenck, Michael, 1996, 'Social Perception', Simply Psychology, Hove, Psychology Press Limited, 2001. pp. 288, 299