So I've never done a blog before, and although this is just for me, it's still making me kind of nervous!
So on the 25th January I will begin my BA Honours in Classical Studies and to say I'm excited is a massive understatement. I truly believed I'd missed my change over a decade ago when my mental health and a misplaced, teenage desire to "just make money and have a job" overtook any need to get an education and left me with little more than a handful of GCSE's and a lack of direction.
I know this is not a revolutionary opinion, but looking back at my days in school, it's painfully clear how little exposure I had to the very real and very available career options outside of the "be a doctor, accountant or teacher" spiel. To me, it seemed that history could only ever be a part of my life in two ways - as a hobby, or as a career only if I was happy to become a teacher (no, thank you), and so I settled on the former and found myself falling deeper into a career that I knew from day one was just the comfortable option. I'm not built to be a corporate success, I don't have the cut throat attitude I needed to get ahead, nor do I have the capacity to pretend I care so deeply about the end of year deliverables that serve no purpose other than to line the pockets of the people who are cut throat enough, or the "mission and values" of a company that I have zero loyalty to. It became defeating and exhausting, and after serious burnout and a massive impact on my day to day mental health, I simply decided enough was enough.
Could I afford to just quit my job on a random Wednesday in October, knowing I live alone and needed to pay rent? Um, no. Did I have a single plan in place to at least ensure I knew where I was headed? Also, no.
But was it the biggest relief I had felt in over decade? Undeniably.
I am terrified, I am nearly 3 months in to my unemployment, I've handed my notice in on my rental property and I'm moving back in with parents until I can find a job that I can get excited about whilst I'm studying (I have a applied for a few actually, so fingers crossed!). BUT, I also feel lighter than I have done in years, I am excited to see what 2025 will bring and for the first time in a long time, I don't see the rest of my life in a bleak, grey, corporate light.
I can do this, I will do this, and if I can, anyone can - so if anyone but me is reading, I believe in you. You have got this.