Continuing my response to a level 3 Certificate in 'Mental Health and Mental Health Advocacy at Work' during which I tried to use the null hypothesis to prove the positive hypothesis.
Explain the importance of positive relationships and effective
communication when supporting individuals with mental ill health.
The importance of positive relationships:
People are fragile; fragile in their ability to believe in themselves.
One of the ways that people affirm their relevance is by talking about
other people when those people are absent. Because most of us are so
fragile that we compare ourselves to other people in the hope of finding
some kind of malfeasance or aberration in those other people which does
not exist in us, we need to make announcements to friends, colleagues,
and relatives of our brilliance by inferring the possession of opposite
traits to the slurred persons. However, only the most crass person
would make direct comparisons out loud. In diminishing other people
during conversation (some would say gossip) we might say ‘She can’t keep
a job’ and ‘She sponges off the Government’ to infer by suppressed
premises that if one can say that about another in a disapproving
manner, then one is not of the same ilk, or is better than that.
In order for this kind of conversation to take place, there must exist,
at least, a perception in the speaker that the recipient of these
treacherous statements is receptive to such atrocious postulation. In
these situations there is a mutual bonding taking place, or a
reaffirmation of a bond.
Sadly, it is the human condition to make comparisons to other people,
past or present. Even in a religious group there should be a continuous
and concerted striving to be a better person than one has been in the
past or, in a fug of self-righteousness, better than the ‘nasty’ person
they have just encountered in the shop or at the bus-stop. How then can
we have a positive relationship with anyone if we are different to the
norm that the individual is used to, without also ‘back-stabbing’? If we
are different to the person we are trying to reach, will that person
relax in our presence?
With this in mind, a positive relationship with an individual with
mental ill health, when supporting them, must either be fully
intertwined with an acceptance of their mental ill health which may
present as them being part of the hegemony of talking about people
behind their backs (which is plainly a sign of mental ill health -
doubting themselves or feeling insecure or diminished); or completely
refrain from mentioning their insipid perception of others and their
characteristic of openly maligning other people. So, the dichotomy is
whether to be mentally ill and join in, or ignore this widespread
manifestation of mental ill health in others and be seen as ‘holier
than thou’. It is not without purpose that many religions have an
underlying current of advising the supplicant to be non-judgemental; In
other words – don’t bring someone down in your estimation to make
yourself feel better.
Here then, we can understand that making no judgement and refraining
from making declarative statements is a good position to be in when
preparing a figurative garden for positive relationships to grow. And,
this is certainly where one should be when supporting someone with
mental ill health.
Putting aside narcissism and its cousins as being aspects of mental ill
health, and driving too fast, unprotected sex, and getting drunk at the
weekends as being self-harm, perhaps we should focus on the blatant and
most commonly perceived mental ill health manifestations and, more
keenly, on vocally expressed mental angst or ill health as being the
best grounds for positive relationships to be efficacious when in
support of someone with mental ill-health; as in ‘I am the same as you’.
Many full time employees spend more time at work than at home with their
families, or in the company of their friends and preferred
acquaintances. This actually might not be true yet it is true that they
may not be adequately engaged with their families – either they are
asleep or lack fertile consciousness in a flagging relationship. If a
fruitful engagement is lacking outside of work, then it is important
that the individual is in a positive environment at work, if only as a
bolt-hole.
In a positive work environment, with positive relationships, there is a
reduction of the chance of employees feeling isolated. Many isolated
individuals can descend into an attitude of low motivation and low
morale. Of course, these two traits, from the business’ position will
negatively impact on productivity or the quality of the work effort.
However, where there are positive relationships, populated by trust,
encouragement, empathy, and support, employees should feel more positive
in their approach to problems, at work and outside of work, and even
the banality of their work if their role involves repetitious effort or
mundane tasks. With positive relationships at work, even though they may
be superficial and conditional on being an employee at the same work
site, there is good reason to believe that absenteeism is reduced and
there is a better worker to output ratio.
The importance of communication, including having difficult conversations and active listening:
A question that arises here is: How far should
Corporate Social Responsibility extend, and what should be included in the package?
Of course, company policies and procedures, Health & Safety
Regulations, and hierarchical protocols need to be made clear to the
inductee during an initial meeting at work. And, certainly, these
aspects of being in work need to be re-iterated or, at least, available
to the employees. Yet, how far should the employer reach into their
employees personal lives?
While, large organisations may have an HR department that can handle
mental health issues, most of the UK’s economy is made up of SMEs (Small
and Medium Enterprises). In fact, according to businessadvice.co.uk,
99% of the nation’s business population is an SME, which together employ
60% of the country’s workforce. SMEs individually have less than 250
employees and an annual turnover of less than £50 million GBP.
Communication is so important that it is problematic when the content or
direction of communication is inappropriate, or perceived to be
invasive. As for difficult conversations, there must be at least one
participant who has an even countenance and a large degree of
equanimity. Where does a small business find someone like that?
Realistically, a good listener who can show empathy is most useful when
difficult conversations are to be had or commence. Someone trained in
Personal Sales, particularly Solution Sales, would be a good person to
designate as the go-to mental health person. Let us never forget that
any concerns that an employee has about their work conditions and
environment is indicative of a risk factor for mental ill health.
Work-related issues SHOULD therefore be dealt with, with one eye on
preventing, diverting, or alleviating mental anxiety.
From a wide and wistful perspective, the two old chaps working together
at jointly hand-sawing a log at a sawyers mill, who barely talk at all
is a scene of connectedness, even communication; if this is a scene in
‘The Waltons’, the 1970s television series set somewhere on an American
mountain. Today, the trust in a work colleague’s ability and capacity
can be as reassuring to employees as when there is a fevered to-and-fro
rap between a conversation’s participants. Inevitably though, someone
with mental ill health will have a predilection towards using their
SmartPhone to assuage their worries and their inability to ameliorate
their perceived problems; the typical ‘Ostrich with its head in the
sand’ syndrome.
In contrast, if we go back to ‘The Waltons’ scene there is a reassurance
of stability, trust, and a well of sound advice waiting to quench any
thirst when feeling uneasy. This lack of vocal conversation is the most
valuable, and rarest, facet of good communication.
Postive relationships require communication, and communication that is
intended to be effective as a platform for understanding an individual
will likely be open to shared work concerns and reciprocal support.
Participants in this type of communication might include managers,
supervisors, work colleagues holding the same position, tutors, and
welfare staff (including HR).
Back to SmartPhones: Active listening usually means showing the speaker
that one is listening to them. Often, this is accomplished by
paraphrasing their statements and sending it back to them. This assures
the speaker that they are making sense and they are understood by an
attentive and interested person. In the modern day, a dilemma arises on
whether a SmartPhone in the meeting should be used during a
conversation to access a website that pertains to mental health, or
clarification on a legal aspect, or something else that is currently
being discussed. We, commonly, believe that the use of a digital device
during a conversation with a real person in the same room (analogue
conversation) is indicative of diverted attention. It is, however, fine
to use a pen and paper, in a 1970 / 80s film scene that is set in a
psychiatrists office.
Whether to actually take notes is a bone of contention; many people
would feel slighted if the listener did not take notes. It comes down to
this: if the listener has never had any kind of therapy or attended a
GP or A&E department at a hospital with any kind of serious problem
then this listener would not be inclined to take notes because they
might be following an idea that it shows a lack of concentration on the
speaker’s words (diverted attention).
If the SPEAKER has had therapy or attended their GP or A&E with a
serious condition they would be used to having notes taken as they
speak. Consequently, this speaker would feel affronted and ignored if
notes are not taken. Whether the speaker is talking nonsense or not, the
words, disjointed sentences, and spoken references, are important to
them at that time. Special attention MUST be shown to those words, and
particularly any emphasis placed on them. We all know, though, that if
you write your thoughts down when you come back from the pub on a Friday
night, the next morning they make no sense. Nonetheless, they were
important at the time. If the words are nonsense in listening
circumstances then just doodle notes if you are listening, or even not
listening.
The hazard here is that only one in four people will experience strong
mental ill health; which means that three in four people believe they
are normal and they use a misaligned form of thinking to deal with other
people, more specifically the one person in four segment of the
population. ‘Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.’
Completely wrong when you are dealing with mental crisis or any kind of
relationship – it takes no consideration of what the other person(s)
actually feel and what THEY want to happen. The Biblical sense behind
the statement is that one should not steal from; lie to; attack; talk
about; take advantage of; another person. It makes no in-roads into
deciding what personal preferences someone else has.
Certainly, CARES, one of many Customer Service protocols, has:
Communication as its first goal - clearly communicate the process and set expectations;
Accountability - taking responsibility for fixing the problem;
Responsiveness - don’t make the customer wait for for your communication or solution;
Empathy – acknowledge the impact that the situation has on the customer;
Solution – at the end of the day, make sure to solve the issue(s) or answer the question.
Is it the fixation on a subject while we are still waking that writes the Table of Contents for our day? Tomorrow, after I have washed and made a cup of tea and before I do anything else, perhaps I shall write a few words on flowers to see if I do more in my garden later in the evening - I have outside lights.