I went to see The Dark Tower last week, the film based on
the Stephen King books. I think this was
a one off and it wasn’t a bad effort.
Although, I thought, Idris Elba was too young and fresh-looking for the
role of The Gunslinger. In the books
Roland is ancient and has been around forever.
Also, it was all a bit too quick for my liking but I won’t complain too
much about having to look at Matthew McConaghey, for an hour and a half, or Idris Elba for that matter!
The Dark Tower is a whole epic of 7 books originally (apparently 2 more have been added which I haven’t read) and were all very
enjoyable, except for the ending. If you
haven’t read the series, then you’ll have no idea what I’m talking about now,
but I’ll try not to give too much away in case they’re on your ‘to read’
list. The problem I had with the ending,
was the very same thing Stephen King referred to in Misery (great book,
mediocre film), when Annie Wilkes pulls Paul Sheldon up for cheating with the
story like they used to do in the old Saturday shows, when you were sure the
hero had died going over the cliff in the locked, burning car, or some such, but
by the next week he has somehow managed a miraculous escape.
The Dark Tower had one of those endings. Roland had moved back in time and was leaving with
the horn of Eld after the battle of Jericho Hill but that didn’t make sense to
me. I’m doing an Annie Wilkes now! He
would have had to go back and re-fight the battle in order to win it and in my
mind he would also have to go back to when he entered Hambry and save Susan
I’ve read quite a few Stephen Kings, they are my pleasure in
between the heavy stuff. Misery is my
favourite book, and my favourite film adaptation is Stand By Me. The re-make of It, is out this week and if
the trailers are anything to go by, then it’s something to look forward to. I know a lot of people were disappointed by
the ending in the movie first time around so I’m not sure how that’s going to
be rectified but what works in fiction doesn’t necessarily work on screen. Anyway, I won’t spoil it by giving away any
details. However, I will say that the
endings of several of Stephen’s more recent novels were disappointing, Under
the Dome was one and Joyland another, Revival too, was a bit of a let-down but
my biggest disappointment this year, was not a book but a film, the final
Planet of the Apes movie, War for Planet of the Apes.
Firstly, it wasn’t a ‘War’, it was a battle and not much of
a battle either and from looking at the trailers beforehand; I was expecting
WW3 with nukes. Mind you, the way Donald
and the Young ‘Un are squaring up, we could be headed for the real thing any
day now! I’m convinced Lil Kim, could
make a case for an Ulster Scots grant with his name!
The big let-down, apart from the ‘war’, was all the emoting
that was going on. It was like an
episode of Dr Phil! Caesar was giving it
all the dramatics of rage and burning anger, like an obstreperous
teenager. While Maurice, the big orangutan,
was giving out so much deep and meaningful advice, I half expected him to be
given his own talk show.
Then, there were parts of the story that didn’t make sense
either. How did the soldiers manage to
capture the other apes when Caesar was following them, and the other apes had
been left behind?? Go figure?? The real pity is, the cgi was the best I’ve seen but like so many ‘epics’, too much
thought given to the ‘show’ and not enough to the story. Yes, James Cameron, I’m talking about your
Avatar (great visuals, lazy, old, clichéd story) You think you would have learnt from the hash
Lucas made with Star Wars!
Anyway, if the
books and movies have been disappointing, at least music brings its own rewards
and the God of Rock, himself, the one and only Mr Robert Plant, returns to the
Ulster Hall in December! And I will be
The new Star Wars is out then too, lets hope that's 2 bright spots on the December horizon to look forward to. May the force be with you or rock on! Whatever, is your wont!