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A Brendan Behan One Liner

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I saw a sign that said, “Drink Canada Dry”. So I did.

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One Liner

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I bought some fossil wood 100 million years old. It was Jurassic bark.

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Pansies

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I wanted to brighten things up for the winter so I bought some pansies online. 20 plants ready to flower came beautifully packaged and with proper care they will be in bloom right through to April 2023. Here are some of them. Things need tidying a bit, so it's not a terrific photo, but you can see they are flourishing quite nicely.


I wondered where "pansy" came from so I did a bit of looking up and found it's from French pensée = thought, according to Wikipedia because it symbolised remembrance.

In the OED I found a nice quote from 1771

"On that fair bank a Pansy grew, That borrowed from indulgent skies A velvet shade and purple hue."

J. Langhorne Violet & Pansy in Fables of Flora 32   

Permalink 1 comment (latest comment by Jessica Shier, Thursday, 13 Oct 2022, 13:26)
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New blog post

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When I say

I’d go to the ends of the earth for you

I really mean with you


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The dance of democracy

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Edited by Richard Walker, Wednesday, 12 Oct 2022, 00:21

Nobody knew of

Our dance in the polling station

where they held the secret ballet

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boastcards.com

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A website for people who want to brag about their holiday.

Permalink 1 comment (latest comment by Jessica Shier, Monday, 10 Oct 2022, 21:44)
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Pronunciation

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How many glottal stops are there in “bottle tops”?

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One liner

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Narwhal dentist. That’s an easy job.


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What’s the score?

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Edited by Richard Walker, Tuesday, 4 Oct 2022, 22:01

Narwhals 1 - Humans ?

Permalink 1 comment (latest comment by Richard Walker, Friday, 7 Oct 2022, 23:09)
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Suppertime and the liver is queasy

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Had a Beef Wellington the other night. Bitterly disappointed. It was as tough as old boots.

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One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich, by Solzhenitsyn, based on his experiences in a Soviet forced labour camp in the 1950s. 

The most chilling quote so far

“Prisoners are not allowed clocks”.

Permalink 1 comment (latest comment by Richard Walker, Tuesday, 1 Nov 2022, 00:24)
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The Wanderer

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My heart leaps up...

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My heart leaps up when I behold 
   A rainbow in the sky.



A friend captured this view from the top of Cat Bells at 09:27 this morning.
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Disaster

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Edited by Richard Walker, Saturday, 1 Oct 2022, 22:41

Disaster’s bound to strike

Sooner or

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An X goes into a bar joke

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A pelican goes into a bar and says, Can I pay for last night? The barman looks at him and says, You’ve got a massive bill.

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Hangover wisdom

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A bad hangover leaves you confused the next day but a worse one lasts until the daze after tomorrow.

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A fun thing to try

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Edited by Richard Walker, Thursday, 29 Sep 2022, 14:58

Seated in a chair, raise your right foot from the ground and start moving it in a clockwise circle. While continuing to move your right foot, extend your right for finger and draw a figure 6 in the air. What happens? 

See here for a YouTube video about this surprising effect.

It appears on lots of web sites, often under the title 'How smart is your right foot?' but I hadn't come across it before.

Permalink 1 comment (latest comment by Judith McLean, Thursday, 29 Sep 2022, 13:13)
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One Liner

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I’m reading a book about blotting paper. Very absorbing.

Permalink 3 comments (latest comment by Richard Walker, Monday, 26 Sep 2022, 14:31)
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Floral probabilities

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I’ve just bought 12 baby polyanthus plants via Amazon. When they flower they will be an assortment of 6 colours and I’m assuming there will be 2 plants of each colour. But at the moment they all look pretty much the same.

I’m planning to give 4 plants to a friend. Given we will be picking the 4 at random…

What is the probability that my friend will receive 4 plants all different colours?

Permalink 3 comments (latest comment by Joseph McDonnell, Tuesday, 27 Sep 2022, 05:44)
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What is this?

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Edited by Richard Walker, Tuesday, 4 Oct 2022, 00:35


It’s very beautiful and resembles frost crystals, or perhaps some kind of mineral formation (although I suppose ice is a mineral, thinking about it). But what you see here is a fungus, the ‘urchin earthfan). My brother took the photograph.

There’s a good article about this fungus here

https://www.first-nature.com/fungi/thelephora-penicillata.php



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Colour joke

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What colour leaves you in the dark? Light blew.

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Paying through the nose - true story

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Tonight when I paid my bar bill I held the card reader to my right nostril, and my Apple Watch to the left. Everything went through. So I literally paid through the nose.

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One liner

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New TV series about falconry. Britain’s got talons.


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Colour joke

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What colour leaves you abandoned on a desert island?

Maroon.

Permalink 2 comments (latest comment by Richard Walker, Monday, 19 Sep 2022, 21:35)
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.

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Edited by Richard Walker, Sunday, 11 Sep 2022, 14:45

"By their very nature bureaucracies have no conscience, no memory, and no mind."

I've been trying to remember this quote. I found it striking when first told it but I'd partly forgotten it so it's taken a while to track down. It’s by the American anthropologist Edward T. Hall, although I still can’t find where he wrote or said it


Permalink 4 comments (latest comment by Jan Pinfield, Tuesday, 20 Sep 2022, 08:59)
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